Entre filles

Hi everyone, I hope everyone is fine around here, I know that most of the people reading my blog are from France, and I understand that the healthcare situation is getting worse.

I must admit I’m not really connected to the news, but I receive emails from brands organising events in France, who are finally canceling them. Ouch, we’ve heard it all before…
Here no one has dropped the mask, and no change is coming for now. We’ll see… It’s been three weeks since Matthieu left, I don’t know precisely when he’ll be back, but it won’t be long. The fact is, that the little one really needs her dad. She may only be one, but she understands absolutely everything, each morning, she repeats: ‘poo, poo, poo…’
And now you’re asking yourself, what’s that got to do with it?!
Try working that out, she could never pronounce the word Dad, so she prefers to call him that. I’m yelling! It’s the first word she has said by the way, it’s almost sweet!

These three weeks alone, have been quite demanding like I said, especially since I am in a country that I don’t know, a new city that I’m discovering on my own.
Indeed, my little brother Romeo sleeps at the moment, but he travels a lot between Oman and Abu Dhabi with his car, so I’m quite alone with my little one, but it’s not such a bother. Indeed, I tend to miss my friends, but I’ve been lucky to find very kind people here, people who like me have been new residents at one point and extend a hand to me, constantly. Really, I can’t believe the solidarity there is between expats. It’s amazing.
I don’t really need any help but still, it’s nice to know there are people close by that I have only known for three months, that I could call if I need to.
Anyway, three weeks that I live my best life as a solo mother (even if I’m tired), and I don’t know if I should feel embarassed about it or not, but I found a kind of balance that is very satisfying.
One thing my mother told me one day comes back to me, she told me that for her, it was easier to raise her kids alone than with our daddy at home. She explained that everything depended on her, whether it be the education or life in our home, and that finally even if it was a big mental workload, it was an exercise in which she fell at ease because she decided on everything. Today, I think I understand what she meant. In the end, and even if we already know it, it’s crazy how the arrival of a baby shakes a balance. I already find it so hard to live with someone else, and ideally (don’t judge me, if my father comes around here, I’ll have to explain myself haha), I would never live with my partner. Or at least on the same landing, in the same building, but each in his own home. Sometimes I think the human being is made to live with someone else, and other times, I feel that we’re born alone, and we leave alone. Sometimes, I think there is no pattern that fits more than the other. It’s really proper to everyone. Personnally, I like to call the person I share my everyday life with, my life partner.
I like to think that sharing your life with someone, whether you’re 20, 40 or 70 years old, should only be a bonus, if you have an opinion about that, don’t hesitate to tell me. Being alone, isn’t something that scares me, especially as it’s the model I was given.
I noticed that you can me a solo mum while appreciating your work, taking care of yourself, having a great social life, and being simply happy.
This was the case for my mum, even if everything wasn’t always easy. Obviously, at times, she would have liked to go through some hardships with someone. But it was her choice at times, to be single. Don’t worry, I’m not saying I’m single, I’m just confirming the fact that for three weeks, and for the first time, with a child, I’m handling things alone and I think I’m doing it quite well. I can even taking advantage of it. I managed to turn a difficult situation at the start, into a pleasant moment to share with my daughter and new rituals. So quite cool.

With this, I dropped off Azel at daycare, I came back home to answer a few emails while drinking a smoothie, I took advantage of this moment to write this post, and now, I’ll go to see a friend (met recently), who just moved in her new house. I’m still in Dora the Explorer mode, as soon as I can go out and discover a new neighbourhood, a new place or other, I don’t need to be asked twice.
I wish you a nice week and see you soon!

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